Pharyngula

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Monday, September 19, 2005

Syncretic silliness

How about an ecumenical Intelligent Design story?

Day No. 6:

"Today I'm really going out there," said the Lord God. "And I know it won't be popular at first, and you're all gonna be saying, ‘Earth to Lord God,' but in a few million years it's going to be timeless. I'm going to design a man."

And everyone looked upon the man that the Lord God designed.

"It has your eyes," Zeus told the Lord God.

"Does it stack?" inquired Allah.

"It has a naïve, folk-artsy, I-made-it-myself vibe," said Buddha. The Inca sun god, however, only scoffed. "Been there. Evolution," he said. "It's called a shaved monkey."

"I like it," protested Buddha. "But it can't work a strapless dress." Everyone agreed on this point, so the Lord God announced, "Well, what if I give it nice round breasts and lose the penis?"

"Yes," the gods said immediately.

"Now it's intelligent," said Aphrodite.

"But what if I made it blond?" giggled the Lord God.

"And what if I made you a booming offscreen voice in a lot of bad movies?" asked Aphrodite.

(via Exploding Aardvark)


Trackback url: http://pharyngula.org/index/trackback/2959/alEfKnAt/

Comments:
#40658: coturnix — 09/19  at  04:21 PM
Oh, the whole thing is sooo funny. But I noticed something terrible - where is the Flying Spaghetti Monster!!!!?????



#40660: — 09/19  at  04:52 PM
Oh, the whole thing is sooo funny. But I noticed something terrible - where is the Flying Spaghetti Monster!!!!?????

I think he would make some observation about spaghetti straps on the dress.


Sorry.



#40662: coturnix — 09/19  at  05:26 PM
Is there anyone who can get through the NYT wall and post this whole thing here?
http://select.nytimes.com/gst/abstract.html?res=FB0912FC3D550C738FDDA10894DD404482



#40664: coturnix — 09/19  at  05:32 PM
Brian Leiter has a short (yet stunning) excerpt here:
http://leiterreports.typepad.com/blog/2005/09/why_the_intelli.html



#40666: coturnix — 09/19  at  05:36 PM
This paper has a slightly different excerpt:
http://www.capecodonline.com/cctimes/sciencestudy30.htm



#40668: coturnix — 09/19  at  05:55 PM
Got the whole thing:
http://sciencepolitics.blogspot.com/2005/09/science-study-some-americans-havent.html



#40670: — 09/19  at  06:16 PM
Oh, the whole thing is sooo funny. But I noticed something terrible - where is the Flying Spaghetti Monster!!!!?????

I know I can't be the only one who feels that the FSM thing is getting a bit... old.



#40676: Bob Davis — 09/19  at  06:45 PM
I like this line:
“Fussy,” whispered Buddha to Zeus. “Why not epaulets and a sash?”

Reminds me of Rehnquist's stripes on his gown.



#40684: — 09/19  at  07:44 PM
My personal favorite line is

"There’s gonna be a waiting list," Zeus murmured appreciatively.


Perhaps it's the way I imagine it being said in my head, but I get a chuckle out of that.



's avatar #40686: — 09/19  at  08:14 PM
I know I can't be the only one who feels that the FSM thing is getting a bit... old.


Opinions will vary, but when it comes to FSM, I fall (down laughing) on the side of funny always ala Heinlein's "The Moon is a Harsh Mistress."

Noodly appendages, RAmen, and equal time in the classroom when "controversies" are taught - funny once, funny twice, funny always!

Ctenophore cleavage - almost as cool as worm porn.



#40691: — 09/19  at  10:01 PM
I actually got to discuss pastafarianism with one of the guys in my gaming group today. He's considering seriously converting to pastafarianism, the only thing holding him back is the cost of buying so much pirate regalia.



#40700: — 09/20  at  03:17 AM
I was having a bad day until I read that. Thanks



's avatar #40755: — 09/20  at  02:12 PM
Eh, it's not as if your friend has to go all Blackbeard straightaway, Punc, with gunpowder fuses in his hair and everything. He could start with just an eye-patch and a dagger in his teeth, for instance.



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