PZ Myers. 2005 Dec 24. Merry War on Xmas!. <http://pharyngula.org/index/weblog/merry_war_on_xmas/>. Accessed 2008 Dec 04.
Posted on M00o93H7pQ09L8X1t49cHY01Z5j4TT91fGfr on Saturday, December 24, 2005
Merry War on Xmas!
I got a Christmas card from Tom Ardans today, and it's so good I had to share it.
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lol
Here is a nice peom for the occation too:
http://tildblog.blogspot.com/2005/12/ogrinch-factor.html -
Baby Jesus Brings The Pain!
#: Posted by on 12/24 at 01:54 PM
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I like the detail of Baby Jesus using an AK-47.
#: Posted by on 12/24 at 02:16 PM
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http://www.tshirthell.com/store/product.php?productid=263
Here's my favorite interpretation of the spirit of the holiday.#: Posted by on 12/24 at 02:46 PM -
Isn't there an artist (& probably also a publisher) who deserves a credit here?
#: Posted by on 12/24 at 06:00 PM
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OLD CITY BAR
In an old city bar
That is never too far
From the places that gather
The dreams that have been
In the safety of night
With its old neon light
It beckons to strangers
And they always come in
And the snow it was falling
The neon was calling
The music was low
And the night
Christmas Eve
And here was the danger
That even with strangers
Inside of this night
It's easier to believe
Then the door opened wide
And a child came inside
That no one in the bar
Had seen there before
And he asked did we know
That outside in the snow
That someone was lost
Standing outside our door
Then the bartender gazed
Through the smoke and the haze
Through the window and ice
To a corner streetlight
Where standing alone
By a broken pay phone
Was a girl the child said
Could no longer get home
And the snow it was falling
The neon was calling
The bartender turned
And said , not that I care
But how would you know this?
The child said I've noticed
If one could be home
They'd be all ready there
Then the bartender came out from behind the bar
And in all of his life he was never that far
And he did something else that he thought no one saw
When he took all the cash from the register draw
Then he followed the child to the girl cross the street
And we watched from the bar as they started to speak
Then he called for a cab and he said J.F.K.
Put the girl in the cab and the cab drove away
And we saw in his hand
That the cash was all gone
From the light that she had
wished upon
If you want to arrange it
This world you can change it
If we could somehow make this
Christmas thing last
By helping a neighbor
Or even a stranger
And to know who needs help
You need only just ask
Then he looked for the child
But the child wasn't there
Just the wind and the snow
Waltzing dreams through the air
So he walked back inside
Somehow different I think
For the rest of the night
No one paid for a drink
And the cynics will say
That some neighborhood kid
Wandered in on some bums
In the world where they hid
But they weren't there
So they couldn't see
By an old neon star
On that, night, Christmas Eve
When the snow it was falling
The neon was calling
And in case you should wonder
In case you should care
Why we're on our own
Never went home
On that night of all nights
We were already there
Then all at once inside that night
He saw it all so clear
The answer that he sought so long
Had always been so near
It's every gift that someone gives
Expecting nothing back
It's every kindness that we do
Each simple little act
Paul,
We each create our own reality. You create yours and I create mine. Merry Christmas and my best wishes to you and your family and all our readers.#: Posted by charlie@charliewagner.com on 12/24 at 06:53 PM -
Cool
Merry Christmas!
#: Posted by Mikko Sandt on 12/24 at 06:55 PM -
omg he shot Santa with an official red ryder carbine action bb gun!
#: Posted by on 12/24 at 07:58 PM
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For in the cold of night
When hope has lost its gleam
It takes a babe with weaponry
To bring about the dream
Peace, love and non-literal paganistic blessings!
For Mithras So Loved Mankind and Chinese Food...
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i fail to see the humor in this 'cartoon'. satirical or not, it's in appalling taste.
#: Posted by on 12/25 at 08:24 AM
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Firstly, the cartoon is funny.
Secondly, it is in better taste than the book by John Gibson, "The War on Christmas: How the Liberal Plot to Ban the Sacred Christian Holiday Is Worse Than You Thought", all of Bill O'Reilly, "The Passion of the Christ" and the assignment of unbelievers to Hell by various evangelist preachers. -
True, it would be in much better taste if it was Sam Walton with the gun and the baby was in a heap by Santa along with the bodies of thousands of employees. By the way, Jake, the hand carrier over the trigger assembly makes it more likely that it is an M16. Does that change your concern?
#: Posted by on 12/25 at 09:56 AM
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Happy Decemberween.
Merry Newtonmas.#: Posted by Keith Douglas on 12/25 at 11:29 AM -
Well, I spent Christmas morning sitting in a comfy chair with a cat on my lap, drinking a mug of tea, reading Bertrand Russell and listening to The Jethro Tull Christmas Album. Is that iconoclastic enough?
#1 Son went out west to spend Christmas with his girlfriend's family, which means he's going to have at least a slightly religious time, as GF's father is a minister (nothing he can't handle: Dan's a great guy, and about as liberal as they come). But as a consequence, we had our family dinner last Tuesday. Which means: no spending the rest of today rushing around trying to cook a turkey, set the table, etc. Tonight we'll go see the Narnia movie, which #2 Son informs us is not the heavy evangelical number some folks were anticipating (with either joy or dread).
Oh yes, and today is also #2 Son's birthday. <Handel> "Unto us a child is given......"#: Posted by on 12/25 at 11:40 AM -
It's odd how conservatives in picking this fight with liberals over Christmas parade their sanctimonious disgust when those of us who could really care less about their pseudo war on Christmas throw it back in their face. On second thought, it's not all that odd after all. They've created and maintained this silly little war all by themselves and undoubtedly get the most joy out of such scraps - it's the very reason they've declared this self-serving war in the first place.
So for all you sanctimonious religious types please don't insult our intelligence by proclaiming your disgust and shock over such things. You wouldn't have it any other way. It gives you the chance to display your self-righteousness for all to see and there's nothing more joyful for conservatives than to have the opportunity to express their moral indignation and false superiority. Besides, if there wasn't enough for them to be morally indignant about, they would create it anyway - and they have.
It's classic Durkheimian sociology in action. As Durkheim noted, even within a society of saints - a perfect cloister of exemplary individuals - crimes would necessarily be created (read: "war on Christmas") in order to provide the functional necessity of distinguishing between good and evil, themselves and others. Conservatives, especially religious conservatives, cannot function without a boogie man front and center. They need an evil alter-ego to define who they are, and the more evil and debased this 'Other' is the better they feel about themselves and the more clearly defined they are.
In any event, religious conservatives are so easy, like rats in a maze. Push this button they go here, push that button they go there. I take great joy in pushing religious conservatives' buttons. Watching them froth at the mouth and work themselves up in a frenzy over their own folly is great entertainment. So thanks PZ for pushing this button - I'm enjoying the show! -
Shyster--
You've ruined my Christmas.
Oh well, I was only going to get coal anyways.
Cheers,
J.#: Posted by on 12/25 at 11:57 AM -
Well, I have to fess up -- that's my card alright. I sent P.Z. a few JPEGs of the front, inside and back (complete with a fake greeting card company logo -- 'Dead Reindeer Greetings').
This is my personal Xmas card, sent out to friends and family (although I did not send to my really Chrsitian Conservative relatives, they'd be appalled). BEing a graphic designer kinda means you're expected to have a creative card, so at the last minute I scribbled this in ink, scanned it and colorized it in Adobe Illustrator.
Happy Holidays everbody -- and some of you out there need to lighten up.
Tom#: Posted by on 12/25 at 12:54 PM -
BTW,
Baby Jesus's gun was meant to be a tot-sized M-16. Not that I drew it very well.
Also, Baby J did not shoot Santa -- he's on the same side. The gunfire from unseen foes is coming from the ACLU and secularist Hollywood types, of course. And U of M Biology professors with blogs.#: Posted by on 12/25 at 12:58 PM - Ah, I was wondering who had Santa's allegiance. The conservatives of my youth would have had him and baby Jesus on opposing sides, but nowadays they've made common cause in service to commerce.
- Oh, and if you think that was in appalling taste, look at William S Wilson's recommendation. I told my wife I wanted my presents wrapped in that next year.
- bovine atheist, soldier in the war on Christmas.
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"some of you out there need to lighten up"
Thank you, I think you just made me do that.
I never thought Baby J would need a diaper - apparently religion _is_ crap.#: Posted by on 12/25 at 03:33 PM -
Damn! And from the looks of it them evil libruhls shot Santa in the back too. Baby J needs to get some new cover though. That wasted Xmas tree isn't gonna stop anything.
#: Posted by on 12/25 at 03:35 PM
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I never thought Baby J would need a diaper
no , not just a diaper: it's a Pampers diaper. and that makes the character, the Anti-Christ! - okay, so make the Pampers link this. damn JSP.
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Check out this page on Snopes
#: Posted by on 12/25 at 08:58 PM
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I got a Flying Spaghetti Monster t-shirt for Christmas. Ah, delicious irony!
#: Posted by on 12/27 at 08:37 AM
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It turns out O'Reilly got it upside down. Christmas is colonizing the non-Christian world.
At least, that's how I interpret the stack of Christmas cards my son brought from Bangkok. The message inside each is 'Merry Christmas.'
The outsides are, to say the least, unexpected. I don't know which I like better: the one with the gold statue of Buddha with an offering of a rope of crown flowers; or the one with the topless queen with a peacock on her shoulder, sitting in the forest.#: Posted by on 01/01 at 02:10 PM